The "Shit that doesn't deserve it's own thread" Thread

In here, we will share videos, articles, rants, pictures, or random shit that doesn't really deserve it's own thread. Basically, anything that doesn't deserve a spotlight.

Example: "Who voiced Link in Ocarina of Time?" or "look at the pretty pup (insert link)", or "I just killed a nun an need some place to stay"

Keep the shit contained in here!

Good Idea to keep this all in one topic.

Somewhere in West Philadelphia , you will find an old basketball court with a single ball lying in the middle. Pick it up and start shooting hoops. After a while, a small group of hooligans will approach you and challenge you to a fight, which you must accept.

After the fight, you must go home and relay the events to your mother. She will then inform you that you have an aunt and uncle living in one of the districts of Los Angeles, and out of fear, she will send you to live there for an indefinite period of time.

With your bags packed, go to the street corner, and whistle for a cab. The cab that will pull up will bear the word FRESH on the license plate, and upon closer inspection, novelty fuzzy dice will hang in the mirror. Although you will suddenly realize that cabs like these are extremely hard to find, do not bear any thought to it. At this point you MUST point out in front of the car and say 'Yo homes to Bel Air'. You will stop in front of a mansion, and it will be sometime between 7 and 8 o'clock, even though it will feel like you've been traveling mere seconds. Get your luggage out and say 'Yo homes, smell ya later!', but do NOT turn back to face the cabby. Walk up to the door, look over your shoulder once, and then knock on the door three times.

If you follow these instructions, your life will get flip-turned upside-down.

Haha. nice one Fate.

Wow, I read that entire thing Fate and then right at the end I laughed. It made my night.

Ocarina of Time is the shit.

lol when i heard west phillidelphia i instantly remembered Fresh Prince.

nice

in west philadelphia born and raised

i as soon as i read that the song just came into my head

''Uncle Ricky, would you read us a bed time story, please huh? PLEASE?''
''Alright you kids get into bed and I'll get the story book.
You all tucked in?''
''Yeah''
''Here we go,
Once upon a time not long ago,
when people wore pajamas and lived life slow,
When laws were stern and justice stood,
and people were behavin' like they ought ta good,
There lived a lil' boy who was misled,
by anotha lil' boy and this is what he said:
"Me, Ya, Ty, we gonna make sum cash,
robbin' old folks and makin' tha dash",
They did the job, money came with ease,
but one couldn't stop, it's like he had a disease,
He robbed another and another and a sista and her brotha,
tried to rob a man who was a D.T. undercover,
The cop grabbed his arm, he started acting erratic,
he said "Keep still, boy, no need for static",
Punched him in his belly and he gave him a slap,
but little did he know the lil' boy was strapped,
The kid pulled out a gun, he said "Why did ya hit me ?",
the barrel was set straight for the cop's kidney,
The cop got scared, the kid, he starts to figure,
"I'll do years if I pull this trigga",
So he cold dashed and ran around the block,
cop radioes it to another lady cop,
He ran by a tree, there he saw this sista,
a shot for the head, he shot back but he missed her,
Looked around good and from expectations,
so he decided he'd head for the subway stations,
But she was coming and he made a left,
he was runnin' top speed till he was outta breath,
Knocked an old man down and swore he killed him,
then he made his move to an abandoned building,
Ran up the stairs up to the top floor,
opened up the door there, guess who he saw?,
Dave the dope fiend shootin' dope,
who don't know the meaning of water nor soap,
He said "I need bullets, hurry up, run!"
the dope fiend brought back a spanking shotgun,
He went outside but there was cops all over,
then he dipped into a car, a stolen Nova (?),
Raced up the block doing 83,
crashed into a tree near university,
Escaped alive though the car was battered,
rat-a-tat-tatted and all the cops scattered,
Ran out of bullets and still had static,
grabbed a pregnant lady and out the automatic,
Pointed at her head and he said the gun was full o' lead,
he told the cops "Back off or honey here's dead",
Deep in his heart he knew he was wrong,
so he let the lady go and he starts to run on,
Sirens sounded, he seemed astounded,
before long the lil' boy got surrounded,
He dropped the gun, so went the glory,
and this is the way I must end this story,
He was only seventeen, in a madman's dream,
the cops shot the kid, I still hear him scream,
This ain't funny so don't ya dare laugh,
just another case 'bout the wrong path,
Straight 'n narrow or yo' soul gets cast.
''Good night''

^^
It's like some kind of Dr. Seuss nightmare ;-;

I was playing a Britain mod for Mount and Blade when this appeared on my screen:




I felt brain cells slowly dying the more I looked at it.
[EDIT] Might want to right click, view image on that, more than half of it's cut off :c

You know what really grinds my gears? This Lindsay Lohan. Lindsay Lohan with all those little outfits, jumping around there on stage, half-naked with your little outfits. Ya know? You're a... You're out there jumping around and I'm just sitting here with my beer. So, what am I supposed to do? What you want? You know, are we gonna go out? Is that ... See morewhat you're trying to - why why are you leaping around there, throwing those things all up in my, over there in my face? What do you want, Lindsay? Tell me what you want? Well, I'll tell you what you want, you want nothing. You want nothing. All right? Because we all know that no woman anywhere wants to have sex with anyone, and to titillate us with any thoughts otherwise is - is just bogus.

And you know what else grinds my gears? You America! f**k you! diane?

For more about flatulence, you can visit my ass!

OK. Now that we have practiced kissing and cuddling, we'll practice eating out... at a fancy restaurant.

This is the perfectly destroyed spider web.
Where's the spider?
Knock, knock!
Who's there?
I ate him!

You know what really grinds my gears? Nobody's come up with a new priest and a rabbi joke in like thirty years. Ya know? I mean, okay, ah, umm. Priest and a rabbi go, go onto the supermarket, and, uh, the priest wants to buy a ham. And the rabbi says, "Ah, I can't eat it. It's forbidden." Couldn't eat it. Not allowed, pigs are like superheroes to them. Is it perfect? No, but I, I don't see you coming up with anything. And that people is what grinds my gears

Well, you heard Captain Syphillis, we're going to California!

I'm standing here admist the heated debate over a recent petition to change the name of the city from San Francisco to something a little less gay.

Coming up on Today, Tom Cruise has a new movie and we're gonna be talking to him.
Funny man Al Frankin will be stopping by for a visit.
And Wolfgang Puck shows his recipe for Apple Strudel.

WHO WANTS THIS DOG?

LOL the clip is so funny

fresh prince of bel air = greatest sitcom ever. they should do a comeback.

sorry to change the subject, but I just had a thought.

you know how your not supposed to stand behind a horse, because if you do the horse will kick you really hard with both legs and knock you off your feet.
well i wonder if the same rules apply on Red Dead Redemption

KNOW YOUR DOPE FIEND. YOUR LIFE MAY DEPEND ON IT!

You will not be able to see his eyes because of Tea-Shades, But his knuckles will be white from inner tension and his pants will be crusted with semen from constantly jacking off when he can't find a rape victim. He will stagger and babble when questioned. He will not respect your badge. The Dope Fiend fears nothing. He will attack, for no reason, with every weapon at his command-including yours. BEWARE. Any officer apprehending a suspected marijuana addict should use all necessary force immediately.

Whaaaa?

There was a time when I liked a good riot. Put on some heavy old street clothes that could stand a bit of sidewalk-scraping, infect myself with something good and contagious, then go out and stamp on some cops.

It was great being nine years old.

That's disturbing!

We live in a monoculture.

What does that mean? Well, go out to your street corner. You'll probably see a [hot-dog] stand, [The News] on a screen somwhere, a Gun Store. You'll go into a record store and see new recordings by the usual suspects, maybe a special [Hip-Hop] display rack.

Go out on a streetcorner in London and you'll see the same thing. Same in Prague. Same in Silo Paulo. Same in Osaka, and Grozny, and Tehran, and Jo'burg, and Hobart.

That's what a monoculture is. It's everywhere, and it's all the same. And it takes up alien cultures and digests them and shits them out in a homogenous building-block shape that fits seamlessly into the vast blank wall of the monoculture.

This is the future. This is what we built. This is what we wanted. It must have been. Because we all had the fucking choice, didn't we? It is only our money that allows commercial culture to flower. If we didn't want to live like this, we could have changed it at any time, by not fucking paying for it.

So, let's celebrate by all going out and buying the same damn burger.

McDonalds

Can you imagine an imaginary menagerie manager imagining managing an imaginary menagerie?

What!?

Screaming Meat wrote:MMMMTEXT OLD BEAN

B- but I hate all of those things D: